Social Media tools have grown faster than I can keep up. I cannot come close to keeping up with Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and Pinterest while throwing a few pics out on Snapchat. I still have trouble texting. Even more confusing, I often wonder why people choose to post 
what they post. I’m not the only one in this conundrum though. ABC reported that a third of all divorce filings in 2011 contained the word “Facebook” according to Divorce Online. ABC also reported that, according to the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers, more than 80% of U.S. divorce attorneys said social networking in divorce proceedings was on the rise (Click here for the report). A Clinical Report from the American Academy of Pediatrics entitled The Impact of Social Media on Children, Adolescents, and Families reported that social media can help children through socialization, communication, enhanced learning opportunities, and accessing health information. At the same time, children also risk becoming the recipient of cyberbullying, sexting, Facebook depression, and the influence of advertisers on social media sites. Obviously, we need some family rules to help monitor our family members’ use of social media. The American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) recommends several ideas, like no more than 2 hours per day of screen time for children and other beneficial ideas at this AAP site. Visit them for information to help you manage social media in your family. Although you will find invaluable information on the use of social media on the internet (ironically), I thought it might be interesting to see if God has anything to say about social media. So, here are twenty proverbs that answer some questions and clarify important principles for families using social media. Proverbs…no explanations, just the proverb presented for you to consider and apply to your use of social media.
How much does a wise person share on social media?
- The wise don’t make a show off their knowledge, but fools broadcast their foolishness—Proverbs 12:23 (NLT).
- A truly wise person uses few words; a person with understanding is even-tempered. Even fools are thought wise when they keep silent; with their mouths shut, they seem intelligent—Proverbs 17:27-28 (NLT).
- Too much talk leads to sin. Be sensible and keep your mouth shut—Proverbs 10:19 (NLT).
Consider the power of the words we use and the statements we make on social media:
- With their words, the godless destroy their friends, but knowledge will rescue the righteous—Proverbs 11:9 (NLT).
- The words of the reckless pierce like swords, but the tongue of the wise brings healing—Proverbs 12:18 (NIV).
- Those who control their tongue will have a long life; opening your mouth can ruin everything—Proverbs 13:3 (NLT).
- Gracious words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones—Proverbs 16:24 (NIV).
- As sure as a north wind brings rain, so a gossiping tongue causes anger—Proverbs 25:23 (NLT).
What are the best kinds of words to use on social media?
- Don’t use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them—Ephesians 4:29 (NLT).
- Do everything without complaining or arguing, so that no one can criticize you—Philippians 2:14-15a (NLT).
What about arguing and complaining on social media?
- A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. The tongue of the wise adorns knowledge, but the mouth of the fool gushes folly—Proverbs 15:1-2 (NIV).
- A perverse person stirs up conflict, and a gossip separates close friends—Proverbs 16:28 (NIV).
- Starting a quarrel is like breaching a dam; so drop the matter before a dispute breaks out—Proverbs 17:14 (NIV).
- An offended friend is harder to win back than a fortified city. Arguments separate friends like a gate locked with bars—Proverbs 18:19 (NLT).
- When arguing with your neighbor, don’t betray another person’s secret. Others will accuse you of gossip, and you will never regain your good reputation—Proverbs 25:9-10 (NLT).
The call to use discernment when posting, or reading, social media:
- Wise people think before they act; fools don’t—and even brag about their foolishness—Proverbs 13:16 (NLT).
- The simple believe anything, but the prudent give thought to their steps—Proverbs 14:15 (NIV).
- A wise person is hungry for knowledge, while the fool feeds on trash—Proverbs 15:14 (NLT).
- Do you see someone who speaks in haste? There is more hope for a fool than for them—Proverbs 29:20 (NIV).
Finally, since “social networking is on the rise in divorce cases,” remember:
- The lips of the adulterous woman drip honey, and her speech is smoother than oil; but in the end she is bitter as gall, sharp as a double-edged sword—Proverbs 5:3-4 (NIV).
What other proverbs do you think apply to the use of social media?
integrity, character, and confidence. Most fathers find active involvement in their daughter’s life comes with some challenges. 
know that many opportunities will arise to disagree. Disagreement is good…frustrating, but good. Disagreement allows our daughters to think for themselves. It provides us the opportunity to learn about our daughters by listening intently. Disagreement also provides the opportunity to teach respectful ways to voice our disagreement. A wise father will allow disagreement, even discuss the disagreement. During that discussion, a father can model respect. He can model how to disagree while keeping the relationship a priority. One more thing…realize that some disagreements occur because of differences in maturity and experience. Do not expect your daughter to think like you—they lack the maturity and experience to do so. And, let’s face it, sometimes we are wrong and they are right. So, allow the disagreement. Allow them to think. Allow them to be right and accept it when you (the father) are wrong. 
rolling eyes, exasperating sigh, impatient shifting of weight, and sarcastic tone of voice. If you are like me, just thinking about it raises your blood pressure. As hard as it is to believe, this new “attitude” does mean that your child is reaching a new level of maturity and independence…and that’s a positive thing. The “teen attitude” is often an attempt to assert some independence from the parental control they experienced and needed as a child. However, their brains are still not fully developed. The emotional networks of their brain are more developed than the planning networks of their brain. As a result, their words come out laced with sarcasm and anger while revealing little forethought into whether this helps or hinders them reaching their goal. Sarcasm, by the way, also shows growing mental ability. They have matured to the level of knowing that tone impacts the subtle meaning of what is said, expressing a “double meaning.” They have not learned how to plan ahead in using that new understanding, but…. (Sarcasm, a new mental skill…woohoo, let’s celebrate.)
relationships, or fear about some future event. Sometimes all we need to do to lose the attitude is listen…listen well.
course of action to take with your child is to do nothing. Don’t get me wrong; I still think parents need to remain very active in their children’s lives. Our children need us to guide them and even protect them at times. Still, sometimes the best and most loving course of action a parent can take is to do nothing. When we avoid taking every opportunity to intervene in our children’s activities, we communicate a very important message—”I trust you to do the right thing.” When we permit them to make mistakes rather than jumping in to “save them,” we communicate that same message—”You are a capable person who can learn from mistakes.” 
the sun was still out! But, somehow Mom knew even before the researchers figured it out. Now, I don’t want this to go to your head Mom, but…you were right. 
He had never mentioned this project to his mother before last night. Whose problem is that? 
buttons pushed either. Effective parents learn to identify those buttons and avoid pushing them. I must admit, I still push a few buttons on accident; and, when I do, disaster ensues. So, I decided to look into what pushes my children’s buttons and share my results with you. Perhaps knowing these buttons can help you avoid some of the meltdowns I have endured. So, for the sake of more effective parenting, here are 5 buttons our children hate…and how to avoid pushing them!
pushing this button by making sure limits are necessary, clear, and concise. Let them know the limit ahead of time and explain the reason behind the limits in a way they can understand. 
I watched…my heart went out to her…what should I do? 
hem that we are more concerned about their “feeling good” than we are about their character and integrity. We teach them that their emotions are more powerful than us. We teach them that their emotions are more powerful than truth and discipline.
limit-setting role changes as our children mature. We want them to internalize “non-negotiable boundaries” and learn to establish more negotiable boundaries independently. So, we negotiate some boundaries with them. Yes, negotiable boundaries do exist. For instance, a non-negotiable limit may include: “Everyone has chores to do in our home. Everyone is part of the household so everyone does work in our home.” From that non-negotiable limit, you can begin to negotiate which chores each child will do, how often they will do it, when they will do it, and even in what order. At times, you may even negotiate a change in chores for a day or two based on schedules or some other circumstance. Another non-negotiable limit may include “Our family sleeps at home. We do not stay out all night at parties or our boyfriend’s/girlfriend’s houses;” and, “In coming home at curfew time, we respect other family members’ comfort and sleep.” From these non-negotiable limits, you can begin to negotiate the specifics of curfews—how late is curfew on a school night? Are there nights we want to stay home so we can have a family night? What about weekends? Can curfew be modified for special events like the prom? …you get the idea. There are non-negotiable limits and from those non-negotiable limits you can begin to negotiate specific boundaries. 
“Children are really smart!” They are like little scientists, observing everything and figuring out what makes it tick. They study the properties of objects by banging, shaking, throwing, and squeezing them in order to discover what is hard or soft. Children study flight properties by hurling objects through space and laughing with glee at the one that goes the furthest. They are keen observers of people…little sociologists that watch the reactions of people around them and shape their own behavior in response. Case in point: my baby nephew. My wife held him while I hid behind her head. At “just the right moment” I would peak around my wife’s head and say, “Boo.” My nephew giggled each time my face appeared and I sounded the battle-cry of “boo.” We had a fun time. Little did I know how carefully he was observing my every action, soaking it in and remembering my face. The next day, we went to a Chinese buffet. I sat at one end of the table, my nephew, in his high chair, sat at the other end. Between us sat his mother and my wife. I turned to speak to my wife at one point during dinner and saw his little head at the other end of the table peaking around his mother. As soon as I made eye contact, he ducked behind his mother…and laughed. Moments later, his head appeared again and, with the same stealth, quickly disappeared amidst a giggle. My nephew remembered the game we had played the day before. He could not say my name yet, but he had studied me and the game we had played. A day later, he used that game to get my attention. 
Children are geniuses when it comes to figuring us out. So, even in the midst of discipline, realize that your little Einstein is studying your every move and basing his next plan of attack on your response. Knowing the genius of your children, keep these tips in mind: