An ancient saying, included in many marriage ceremonies, states that “Love is not arrogant and does not boast.” In a roundabout way, research now supports the truth of this statement. I say “roundabout” because the truth of the statement comes by way of awe. We experience awe when we experience something that expands our view or understanding of the world. For instance, we may feel awe in response to the vastness of nature, the beauty of a truly compassionate act, or the all-encompassing beauty of a majestic piece of music. Each of these experiences expands our view of the world around us and makes us feel…well, smaller. Feeling a sense of awe plays a role in our health, happiness, and social connection. It increases our humility. In fact, individuals who report experiencing awe more often in their daily lives were rated as more humble than those who did not report experiencing awe in their daily lives by friends and family. Those who experienced awe also acknowledged their strengths and weaknesses in a more balanced way and recognized the impact of outside forces (including other people) on their personal achievements. This sounds like the very definition of humility, doesn’t it? The sense of humility, in turn, increases a person’s desire to engage with and feel connected to others. Of course, a humble person also tends to have deeper, more secure relationships than an arrogant person. A humble person is more likely to take the other person’s best interest into consideration and is more easily trusted as a result. And…trust leads to better relationships.
And there you have it…awe leads to greater humility lead to better, more secure relationships. So, if you want a better family life, experience awe together. To get you started, here are 4 ways you can experience awe with your family. (Read more in Using the Power of Awe for Your Family.)
- Experience nature. Go for a hike in the woods. Climb to the top of a mountain and look over the valley below. Look up at the stars on a clear night. Stand on the ocean shore and ponder the vastness of the sea. Go snorkeling and enjoy the colors. Watch the sunrise or sunset. Nature often elicits awe. Enjoy it as a family.
- Try something new and exciting. Novelty contributes to awe. Visit someplace you have never been before. Try something new. Go to a symphony or musical. Visit the art museum. Go to an area of the country or state that you have never visited before. Novelty opens the door to awe.
- Get curious. We experience awe when we experience a sense of smallness and we often experience that sense of smallness when we learn something that amazes us. Get curious and learn. Learn about the complexity of the human body, how a bird flies, the character of God, or the wisdom of ancient sayings. Each of these can expand our sense of the world and put our own lives in a different perspective, a perspective of humility.
- Practice spirituality. Stand in awe of God. Worship as a family. Pray as a family. Experience the awe of answered prayer. Gather with other people and sing as a family. Many people experience awe in the religious setting of worship.
When you do experience awe, you will experience greater humility. When you experience greater humility, you will experience greater intimacy in your family. The ancient wisdom is true again, “Love is not arrogant and does not boast”…and that is awe-inspiring!