Parenting is hard work. We have schedules to keep, dinners to prepare, messes to clean up, occupational 
demands, yards to keep, clothes to wash…. The work never ends. Sometimes we get so caught up in the day to day activities of life and in providing for our children, teaching our children, and disciplining our children that we forget to enjoy our children. So, I encourage you to enjoy your child. Spend an evening playing games with them. Go into the back yard and play. Sit on the porch and play cards. Some of my best memories of childhood involve playing board games with my family. Some of my happiest times as an adult also involve playing board games with my family. You don’t have to play board games. You can play imaginative games like “Teacher” (of course your child will probably be the teacher and you the student), Barbie’s, army, catch.
demands, yards to keep, clothes to wash…. The work never ends. Sometimes we get so caught up in the day to day activities of life and in providing for our children, teaching our children, and disciplining our children that we forget to enjoy our children. So, I encourage you to enjoy your child. Spend an evening playing games with them. Go into the back yard and play. Sit on the porch and play cards. Some of my best memories of childhood involve playing board games with my family. Some of my happiest times as an adult also involve playing board games with my family. You don’t have to play board games. You can play imaginative games like “Teacher” (of course your child will probably be the teacher and you the student), Barbie’s, army, catch. I remember playing Barbie’s with my daughter during her preschool years. Sometimes, we had differences of opinion regarding the direction of the play. I wanted to make Ken to fly, have Barbie ride horseback on a giant bug, or join forces to fight the bad guys and save the world; my daughter wanted to dress Ken and Barbie up, go to a party, and sit by the pool, drink tea, and talk. I still cherish the memory of those times of play in spite of our different ideas. I learned so much about my daughter while playing Barbie’s with her. As she made up various scenarios, I learned about her interests and her friends. I learned what aroused fear in her as we acted out various scenes. Under her direction and supervision, we enacted meeting new people, resolving arguments, getting along during disagreements, and sharing important life events… unintentionally practicing a variety of life skills through imaginative interactions.
I also watched my daughter grow more capable in managing her emotions. She would get somewhat frustrated with me at times–I guess I am a frustrating guy at times. After all, I didn’t “talk like Barbie,” my voice was too low. She insisted that I speak in falsetto. In spite of my efforts, I would slip up and she would have to make adjustments–“Oh, you have a cold today, don’t you?” or “Daddy, that’s the wrong voice.” I would quickly slip back into my falsetto. Each time though, she became more efficient at handling her emotions when things did not go as she planned. When she let me play Ken, I would “tease her,” suggesting that Ken could fly. She would calmly insist that Ken could not fly and restate the order of the “proper scene” for me. On occasion, she would even compromise. “OK Daddy, today he can fly. Just this time though.” The skills gained in compromise and negotiation…all from playing Barbie. Perhaps most important, playing Barbie allowed me to spend time with my daughter and develop a more intimate relationship. I don’t even know if she remembers playing Barbie with me. But, I know that those imaginative moments allowed us to laugh together, celebrate imagined and real victories together, and share sorrow over imagined and real loses together. Over all, imaginative moments with Barbie allowed my daughter and me to build a deeper and more secure bond in our relationship. If you don’t get hand-me downs, here is a price list to gain the equipment necessary to play Barbie with your daughter: Barbie doll-$12; clothes for Barbie-$10, time with my daughter building our relationship-priceless!
friends; but, we still eat supper together and meet throughout the day. Their independence does allow me and my wife to enjoy time together. It also allows me some time to people watch. I love to people watch. At an amusement park you find a whole carnival of people, a funhouse of parenting ideas. I wanted to share some of what I saw. 
exotic hairdos, screaming joyfully as they flew down the roller coaster, fixing one another’s hair after spinning around like a dryer. These families took advantage of every opportunity to enjoy one another’s company, play together, eat together, and build intimacy. They were all smiles and laughter. They went home exhausted, but joyful. 
nagging are all disguised calls for love” (G. Godek). A call for love, eh? Well, “it ain’t working.” Still, I do believe it is true. When children are scared or confused or when they feel threatened or disconnected, they will “call for love.” They “call for love” through their behavior…and, misbehavior represents an ineffective communication of that need. Misbehavior, a miscommunicated “call for love,” may flow from any of four directions. Let’s look at them one at a time. 
powerless is to avoid the power struggle. When we step into the power struggle with this child, she has already won. Do not argue. Talk less and act more. Let the “reality of consequences” do the talking. No need to argue about picking up the toys. Calmly offer the choice, “You can pick up your toys now or after dinner. If they are still there tonight, I will put them in time out for the rest of the week.” No arguing, no debating, no lecturing—just a choice and a consequence. Parents can also limit power struggles by eliciting help from the child whenever possible.
caught up in their busy lives that they only give their children distracted attention. Distracted attention is half-hearted attention, attention split between two or more things. Parents give distracted attention when they invest their energy in a project while pretending to listen to something their child is saying. The parent can hear their child’s words, but the meaning just doesn’t register. After giving distracted attention, the parent knows that their child spoke to them, but they probably can’t remember what was said. The distracted parent often responds to their child’s statements with words like, “Oh yeah,” “OK,” or “Really?’ without really knowing what the child said. Children who receive distracted attention on a regular basis feel insignificant and unimportant. Eventually, they will quit coming to the parent. And, they will learn to give us the same distracted attention the parent gives them. 
admit. After all, which is more important: our children or the game, our children or a hobby, our children or the lawn? What we prioritize receives our undivided attention. Children deserve our priority.
world of work or school. That may sound harsh, but true none the less…just watch the news. Students enter the “sacred halls of education” through metal detectors and security guards to sit in classrooms as canine police sniff out lockers for paraphernalia. In the classrooms and hallways, kids strive to satisfy an unquenchable thirst for attention at the expense of their peers. Queen bees slander other students and top dogs humiliate those under them on the social ladder. Each month, we witness multiple news reports of bullying and media harassment; or, we listen as our children tell us about all the “drama” that goes on between students. 
At any rate, the principle of “easy come, easy go” holds true in the “Family Bank of Honor” as well. We rarely speak directly about this bank, but we act on it all the time. We make regular, daily deposits into the “Family Bank of Honor” by practicing daily acts of kindness, respect, grace, and celebration. Every time we listen and respond in love, we make a deposit into the “Family Bank of Honor.” When we speak to one another with kindness or give encouragement and praise, we make a deposit into the “Family Bank of Honor.” A hug, a kiss, or even a loving slap on the back, represents another deposit into the “Family Bank of Honor.” Sometimes, the deposits are obvious; other times, they are subtle and less clear, like honoring one another’s efforts to connect by responding with energy and attention. Whether obvious or not, we make multiple deposits each day into the “Family Bank of Honor.” With each deposit, we enrich our relationships and accrue more emotional savings in the “Family Bank of Honor.” 
good exchanges for every one negative exchange during an argument. He also noted that “master couples” have as many as twenty positive experiences for every one negative experience when they are normally engaged. In other words, happy couples have at least five more positive feelings and interaction than unhappy couples, five to twenty deposits for every withdrawal. So, here is the basic two-step plan for investing in the “Family Bank of Honor:”