Family by God&#039;s Design

Don’t Kill the Messenger

The green dragon opened one eye before quickly raising his head. He sniffed the air as his eyes darted around the room. Something was amiss. Something posed a threat to the relationship that the dragon jealously guarded. He nudges his master, even blows a little smoke in his direction. His master now has a choice:...

Grace Honor

jealousy marriage

March 24, 2025

One Question to Save Your Marriage

Relationships tend to drift unless we become intentional. Today, they drift into the stream of a culture that threatens overwhelm with busyness and stressful events, robbing us of joy. Or they drift on negative feelings that, left unaddressed, eventually accumulate and drown our joy. A simple “research-approved” question can turn that drift around, giving married...

Celebration Grace

emotional health intimacy marriage stress management

March 4, 2025

Make the Gracious Choice

I often feel overwhelmed by the constant criticism, contempt, and name-calling I hear in the news. And…I don’t think I’m alone. I hear many others talk about feeling discouraged as they watch this as well. What we hear in news stories is one thing. What I find even more discouraging is how many people come...

Grace Honor

criticism family family intimacy gratitude

March 1, 2025

Forgive Myself? And My Family?

Many people have told me, “I can’t forgive myself.” Why? Some say they don’t feel deserving of forgiveness. Others fear if they forgive themselves, they engage in the same negative behavior again. They believe guilt keeps them from committing the same error. Neither of these fears are true. In fact, forgiving ourselves actually has several...

Grace

family intimacy forgiveness intimacy marriage

February 17, 2025

The Top 6 Ways to Resolve Marital Conflict

A study published in August, 2024, and appearing in Contemporary Family Therapy offers interesting insight into resolving marital conflict. This study utilized data from 1,112 couples. Specifically, this study explored how the conflict resolution style each person brought to their marriage contributed to their ability to effectively manage conflict in the relationship. They identified 23...

Grace Honor

communication compromise conflict conflict resolution listen marriage self-soothe

January 11, 2025

Easing Transitions: A Lesson From College Transition

Transitions are rough. Some more than others, but all transitions can arouse stress and anxiety, loneliness and even sadness. Perhaps one of the most difficult transitions is the transition into college. A study in Social and Personality Compass suggests a great way to smooth out the transition into college. Although the study specifically dealt with...

Family Shepherds Grace

kindness stress management transition

December 30, 2024

Respect by the Baker’s Dozen

We were given an “echo” for Christmas. After we set it up, we started asking it to play certain styles of music. My family laughed because I added “please” to my requests. Although it may not fit for the “echo,” politeness generally flows from respect, a “due regard for the feelings, wishes, rights, or traditions...

Grace Honor

listening patience politeness respect trust

December 21, 2024

Practice the Radical Generosity of Christmas

Christmas teaches many lessons. One of my favorite lessons is the lesson of radical generosity. Every Christmas we celebrate the “Child born to us and the Son given to us” (Isaiah 9:6), an amazing act of generosity. That act of generosity becomes even more radical when we recognize it was prophesied generations ago as a...

Celebration Grace Honor

attention availability christmas family intimacy gifts serve time

December 14, 2024

An Invitation

Families benefit from phrases that begin with “Let us…” or “Let’s….” “Let us” offers an invitation to engage with one another, to do something together. It is an invitation to a deeper relationship. Sometimes the invitation accompanies fun. Sometimes the invitation comes with work. Even if the invitation suggests a work activity, it implies that...