What makes for a happy, healthy marriage and family? Some would say communication skills. I agree, but I think communication skills flow from more foundational building blocks.

Others might say secure finances or commitment make for a happy, healthy family. Both are important however, I think a truly happy, healthy marriage and family flow from three foundational building blocks: honor, grace, & celebration. Let me explain.

Honoring involves valuing one another. Those we value we learn about. Those we value we treat with dignity and respect.

• Honoring one another compels us to listen well, knowing that the other person has something important to communicate. In honor, we listen deeply and intently.
• Honoring one another teaches us to consider the needs of other family members, not just our own. When we honor one another, we place the needs of our family members above our individual desires.
• Honoring one another motivates us to serve one another. And those we honor we serve with an attitude of joy.
• Honoring one another drives us to learn about one another and celebrate one another’s milestones.

Grace involves the sharing of free, undeserved, and unearned favor and love. Grace is crucial to a healthy family.

• Grace accepts one another unconditionally. It allows each family member to know they are accepted even when they make mistakes, in spite of shortcomings.
• Grace motivates growth and instructs in how to live a virtuous life. It promotes a lifestyle that regards the other person as important and seeks the other person’s well-being.
• Grace compels us to forgive when wronged and to sincerely seek reconciliation, the restoration of broken relationships.
• Grace strengthens us to sacrifice personal desires for the needs of the family and other family members.

When we infuse our families with honor and grace, we become a celebrating family, a family that celebrates the intimacy and love of a healthy family.

• Celebration allows us to play and enjoy one another’s presence, refreshing a positive perspective of one another and restoring intimacy. 
• Celebration allows us to enjoy one another’s milestones, achievements, and talents.
• Celebration propels us to grow in relationship through fun and pleasure.
• Celebration enjoys a reciprocal relationship with honor and grace. Through celebration we honor one another’s milestones and accomplishments. Grace allows us to celebrate restored relationships and growing intimacy.

Take time to consider how you will enact the foundation principles of honor, grace, and celebration in our family. If you want some practical ideas to enact these principles in your family, visit The Family Bank of Honor.

• How will you show honor to your children, your spouse, and your parents?
• How will you share grace with your children, your spouse, your parents?
• How will you celebrate your children, your spouse, your parents, your marriage, your family?