Another “Cheat Code” for Dad: Healthy Physical Affection

If you play video games, you know the value of a good “cheat code.” They can help the player advance to a new level or gain a special power. Other “cheat codes” help the gamer obtain a special tool or weapon you’ll need in the game.

If you’re a Dad of daughters, you may feel as though you need a “cheat code.” You want inside information to help you move toward an advanced level of understanding in relation to your daughter. You likely desire a “cheat code” that will provide a gateway to a special power allowing you to influence your daughter toward maturity.  If so, I have just what you’re looking for: “cheat codes” for dads raising daughters.

Previous “cheat codes” discussed included:

Now it’s time for another “cheat code:” Healthy Physical Affection.

The Cheat Code: Giving Healthy Physical Affection.

Purpose: Giving Healthy Physical Affection will…

  1. Increase trust between you and your daughter.
  2. Enhance cooperation between you and your daughter.
  3. Free your daughter to focus on personal growth rather than putting her energy into seeking ways to find physical affection from other men.
  4. Increase the likelihood that your daughter will seek your input when she is unsure about what to do.
  5. Communicate your love for your daughter.

Value: Healthy physical affection will soothe and calm your daughter. As an added bonus, it will nurture her ability to soothe herself. Touch also expresses love, building your daughter’s belief in her own “lovability” and self-worth. Affectionate, loving touch will help your daughter develop healthy personal boundaries that promote her safety as well. In other words, your appropriate physical affection toward your daughter will protect her from seeking physical affection in “all the wrong place” and from “all the wrong people.” (If you still wonder about the value of appropriate physical affection for your daughter, read A Page from the NBA Playbook for Your Family.)

Instructions: Giving Appropriate Physical Affection involves…

  • Hugging your daughter. Make it a habit to give her a simple hug and a “peck on the cheek” when you separate for the day and when you say “good night.” 
  • Putting your arm around your daughter’s shoulder as you stand together or walk together.
  • “Snuggling up” on the couch with your daughter to watch a show or read a book.
  • Giving your daughter a “high five” or a gentle “slap” on the shoulder to congratulate her. You might give a hug to congratulate as well.
  • Gently bumping shoulders in a fun way just to “say” you’re present with her. (Consider What Piglet Needs to Know & what that tells you about your daughter as well.)
  • Sharing a “fist bump” just for fun.

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