Family by God&#039;s Design

Growing Your Child’s Mind for Success

Our children’s success depends on more than talent and ability. In fact, some children have amazing talent but still avoid challenges, shun effort, and shrink from difficulties. They often believe ability is static, fixed or unchanging. This “fixed mindset” (as Carol Dweck calls it in her book Mindset) interferes with progress and growth, hindering children...

Family Shepherds

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April 23, 2016

The Top 6 Components of an Effective Apology

Let’s face it; we all make mistakes. We all do things in and to our families for which we need to apologize. It could be something as simple as forgetting to pick up the milk or as complex as feeling unloved. Whatever it is, an apology is in order. But, not just any apology will...

Grace Honor

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April 18, 2016

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3 Ways Giving Support Will Benefit Your Family

Paul was on his way to Rome when he called the elders of Ephesus to meet him. He wanted to offer one last message of encouragement to them. That message ended with these words: “…In everything I did, I showed you that by this kind of hard work we must help the weak, remembering the...

Family Shepherds Honor

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April 16, 2016

The Countercultural Message of Marriage

I wonder what Jesus would say about marriage? Of course He did talk about marriage some. But, imagine if He had thrown a “section on marriage” into the Sermon on the Mount. “You have heard it said,” Jesus might begin, “That marriage will complete you and make you whole. But I say to you that...

Grace Honor

character commitment intimacy marriage sacrifice

April 11, 2016

Help My Children Have ANTs in Their Pants…uh, I Mean Brain

If you want to increase your children’s happiness and optimism, you must teach them to exterminate the ANTs—or Automatic Negative Thoughts. Those ANTs scamper around our children’s thoughts and threaten their happiness and success. ANTs come in many varieties. Let me describe four. Absolute, Permanent ANTs (the AP-ANTs). When stressful events or bad things happen, AP-ANTs...

Family Shepherds

emotional health happiness healthy development success

April 9, 2016

Build Forts to Build Mature Children

I lived near a very small (I mean, very small!) patch of woods for part of my elementary school and middle school years. I remember the joy of going “into the woods” and finding natural enclaves under bushes that I could make into “my fort.” A few minor adjustments and additions turned those branches into...

Family Shepherds

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April 4, 2016

A Fourfold Legacy for My Family

In my last blog I shared how people who have never seen a healthy family can begin to raise a healthy family themselves. In doing so, they redeem their family and set the coming generations on a new trajectory toward health and wholeness. In this blog, I wanted to share a brief overview of the...

Family Shepherds Honor

emotional health family intimacy family relationships legacy parenting

April 2, 2016

Healthy Family? Never Saw One

Struggling couples often arrive at my office caught up in a cycle of defensiveness, criticism, shame, hurt, and anger. After some information gathering, I might ask the couple who they know with a marriage they want to emulate. Too many (way too many) say they have never seen a good marriage. They name couples they...