Beauty, Beast, & Your Family
“There is the great lesson of ‘Beauty and the Beast,’ that a thing must be loved before it is lovable.”
G.K. Chesterton (http://www.goodreads.com/quotes/show/201564)
Chesterton makes a great point here. Our actions will either bring out the beast or the beauty in family members. We bring out the beast in family members when we:
- Constantly interrupt them when they speak
- Put our effort into making them understand us
- Put family members “in their place” when they get “too confident”
- Impatiently criticize them and minimize their effort
- Act as though their opinion is less important than our opinion
- Make constant demands on them but give very little
- Constantly complain that they “didn’t do it the right way the first time” or “didn’t do it good enough”
- Make rude comments, gestures, or facial expressions (eye rolls)
- Waste their time by being late or making them do what we could do ourselves
- Break our promises
To bring out the beauty in family members make an effort to:
- Listen intently and respectfully, without interruption
- Put more effort into understanding family members
- Encourage them with your words and actions
- Accept their opinion and even allow it to influence your behavior
- Do something nice for them
- Speak to them with kindness
- Volunteer to do their chore for a week
- Let them have the “shotgun seat” in the car
- Keep your promises
- Politely hold the door open for them
- Say “Thank-you” and “You’re welcome.”
- When the other person acts like a beast, do 1-11 anyway!