Women have always had a special standing in the heart of God. Men may have, at times, attempted to make them second-class citizens, but God has always held women in high esteem. He created women with a special purpose, a purpose that has often been misconstrued. Specifically, He created women as a “suitable helper” (Genesis 2:18-22). When I think of a “helper” I often think of a person who is under “my” guidance, following “my” instructions to help me complete “my” project, a person who knows less than I do but is willing to help. I direct and the “helper” obeys. Even if a “helper” does know more than I do, he still assists me in completing what I want or I need to do. Either way, the focus is on me, not the “helper.” The “helper” becomes secondary to me, “my” goals, and “my” effort. This way of thinking about a “helper” DOES NOT reflect the true meaning of a woman as a “suitable helper.” Not even close! In fact, consider the original words used in Genesis.

“Suitable helper” is translated from the Hebrew “ezer neged.” “Neged” means “before” or “in the presence of.”  A woman, as a “suitable helper,” stands before man, in the presence of man. She stands before him as no other created being can. She stands before him as his equal, made of the “same stuff” as him, “bone of his bones” and “flesh of his flesh.” No other created being can stand before man in this way. No other created being can communicate like him, think like him, feel like him, and want like him. Only a woman can stand before man to fulfill the role of an equal to provide companionship, intimacy, and union.

The term “ezer” comes from a root word meaning power and strength. It is used twenty-one times in the Old Testament—twice in reference to the creation of a “suitable helper,” three times in a military context, and a full sixteen times in reference to God. Don’t miss that breakdown: The term “ezer” is used in reference to God sixteen out of twenty-one times. God, our Helper (our “Ezer”), is our Deliverer, our Strength, our Shield, our Creator. Obviously, He is not our Helper in a subordinate way. He is the One who stoops from His position high above us in wisdom and strength to “help” the powerless. He is the Helper who reaches out to us with a power great enough to lift us up and give us honor.

This is the image in which your wife is created, an image that “stands before you,” face to face with you, to reflect God’s power and strength reaching out to man in his need, strengthening him in times of weakness, encouraging him in times of discouragement, and bringing him honor.

Think about this for a moment. From the beginning of humanity, God created woman to represent His strong presence in a man’s life, an equal companion that no other created being can become. God created her to stand face to face with man. He created her to reflect and bear witness to His power, presence, and help in a man’s life.

Of course, Adam and Eve sinned in the Garden and sin distorted the image of God’s creation. But His original intent remains unchanged; and, in Christ, we find His original design restored. In Christ, we become the bride of Christ and fellow-heirs with Christ, through whom our God (our “Ezer”) delivers us. In Christ, we are called to “honor our wives as fellow-heirs of the grace of life” (1 Peter 3:7). Your wife is a fellow-heir, equal to you in Christ and spiritual privilege. She stands before you to reflect and bear witness to God’s presence, power, and strength in your life. She is your “ezer neged.” Treat her well.

*Adapted from For His Eyes Only: A Devotional Workbook & Prayer Guide for Husbands