The average cost of a wedding in the United States is now between $34,000 and $36,000. That represents an enormous investment. If a couple prepares only for their wedding and not for their marriage, they may spend money to end their marriage in 7-8 years, the most prevalent years of divorce. If the couple does not invest in their marriage, they will have to pay out the costs of divorce, which may range from $7,000 to $10,000 but could range to excess of $50,000. That’s just counting the financial costs, not the mental, emotional, and identity costs. But, when a couple invests in their marriage, they receive huge rewards of joy, well-being, greater physical and mental health, and belonging. In addition, “Married householders under the age of 35 had a net worth 9.2 times more than unmarried female householders and 3.1 times more than unmarried male householders” (From <https://www.thestreet.com/personal-finance/us-net-worth-wealth-data-married-vs-single>). With all the benefit of investing in our marriage, let me suggest 5 practical habits that will strengthen your marriage.

• Invest time in your marriage. Relationships require time. Build time together into your daily life. Spend time at the end of each day talking about your day. Touch bases at the start of the day discussing your plans for the day. Eat a meal together each day. Have a “date time” each week, whether that be watching a movie together at home, going for a walk together, or having dinner out. Whatever you choose, make sure it’s a time of enjoying one another’s company and talking about something other than the coordination of running a household.
• Invest in shared interests as well as individual interests. A wonderful way to spend time together is to develop shared hobbies and activities. Shared hobbies allow you to spend time together in a common activity while having fun interacting and conversing.
• Remove excessive drug & alcohol use from your marriage portfolio. Alcohol and drugs can ruin enjoyable times in marriage. When one or both spouses become intoxicated it can increase the risk of arguments in which people say hurtful things.
• Practice digital transparency. Don’t let social media come between you. Share your passwords with your spouse. Don’t do anything online in private that you would not do in the presence and with the full knowledge of your spouse.
• Share your finances. Some have said that money is one of the leading causes of divorce. I would suggest that it’s not the finances themselves that give rise to marital issues; it is the lack of communication and transparency around finances that give rise to marital conflicts. Think of your finances not as “mine” but “ours,” not as belonging to an individual, but to the couple. Talk about finances. Maintain transparency with one another around finances.

These five practices may sound simplistic, but they represent an investment in your marriage that will not only save you the costs of divorce but bring you greater returns of security and intimacy.