We live in a world that creates in us a “need for speed.”  We want our food fast, our goals achieved fast, and our problems solved even faster. As a result, when a problem arises, the default mode is to “attack” it with speed so we can “get it done.” But speed is not always the answer. In fact, in many circumstances the best way to get something done quickly and efficiently is to go slow. I’m not necessarily talking about “dragging your feet.” I’m talking about taking the wisdom of the tortoise over the hare. I’m suggesting that many times the best way forward, the best way to get something done well, is to take a sacred pause to think before moving forward with intention and purpose.

This may be especially true when it comes to family and family relationships. When family members disagree and argue, it may take more time than a quick “I’m sorry” to repair the relationship. We may want our children to “grow up,” but if we push through childhood too quickly we miss out on the joys of watching them grow and mature. We have to slow down and let them be children, for it’s through living like a child—making the mistakes of a child and learning from those mistakes, trying on various roles and emotions through pretend play, navigating the dance of various relationships—that a child matures and grows. Developing the intimacy inherent in a deeply loving marital relationship is a slow process, a process that requires time and patience. Maintaining that loving marital relationship for a lifetime demands we not rush through life together but slowly savor life together—the joys and sorrows must be processed together over time. Sure, there may be seasons of rush, a roller coaster period of time. But to truly allow that roller coaster to shape our relationships in a positive way requires the slow walk afterwards so we talk about what just happened, each twist and turn of the journey and how it impacted us together.

Yes…a happy family life is built on the philosophy of the tortoise, not the hare. The joys are nurtured as we stop to smell the roses and slow down to enjoy the moments. Intimacy is grown as we slow down to hold one another up through the sorrows and nurture one another in times of pain. These moments all take time,…slow…moving…time…together. Trust that everything that needs to get done will get done and slow down. Slow down and focus on nurturing one another’s lives and your lives together. The harvest will come…and the fruit will be delicious.