We need Valentine’s Day more than ever. The world around us seems to be falling into an ever-widening, ever-deepening pit of hate, mistrust, and division. Worse, this pit threatens to swallow up our families in subtle and not-so-subtle ways. The stress and strain of seeing the division, the horrid abuses, and the hateful rhetoric adds a level of stress to our families’ daily lives. It pulls at our heart strings of compassion for those suffering. It threatens to drag us into the rabbit holes of both conspiratorial and, sadly, real inhumane disasters. That rabbit hole can isolate us from our marriages and our families. All of this gives rise to feelings of helplessness and hopelessness. It builds and compounds the stress that threatens to create a drift between us and our spouse, our children, and our parents.

In an even less subtle way, you and your spouse may find yourselves on opposite sides of the aisle, believing different things about the current “state of our union.” If we follow the culture, this results in the erection of a thick wall between you and your spouse, people of opposing views.

That’s why we need Valentine’s Day more than ever. We need time to remind us of our love for our spouse, time to reflect on the innumerable moments of love and joy we have shared together. We need Valentine’s Day to remember the best in our spouse and, once again, fall in love with them.

This Valentine’s Day, I offer this challenge. Spend a whole day with your spouse. Turn off the news. Put down the cellphones. Don’t check your email. Refuse to scroll your social media accounts. And spend the day focused on your spouse and your relationship. Cook breakfast together. Go for a walk. Play a game. Reminisce about your favorite dates and most memorable vacations. Retell the story of how you met. Look into your spouse’s eyes and tell them what you love about them, their character and their person. Explicitly state what you find beautiful about them, both in a physical sense and in their personality. In other words, intentionally remember your first love…and enjoy your valentine.